23 Jan 2013, San Diego, California, USA --- Smiling couple holding hands and hiking outdoors --- Image by © Hero Images/Hero Images/Corbis

23 Jan 2013, San Diego, California, USA — Smiling couple holding hands and hiking outdoors — Image by © Hero Images/Hero Images/Corbis


You have been friends with a guy for about a year and along the line you happen to develop feelings for him. Do you think it is proper to open up to him?



Opening up to a guy or not opening up to him is not a big deal. The real deal is why do you want to open up to him? Is it because you want him to notice you and ask you out? Or you want to know if it’s worth waiting/hoping on?

Truth is, it is not pride or “forming” like it may be called but I would not advise any lady to be the first to open up to a guy. What if you like another one later? Will you open up to that one too…and others that you will develop feelings for along the way?

I think we can take a cue from a lady I know who liked a particular guy (although he was in a relationship). She never opened up to him and kept doing thing, focusing on her purpose. All of a sudden, he started taking interest in her. Today, they are married. She only revealed the secret when they got together, not before.

I know that as lady we are emotional beings, so we tend to think if we don’t open up we would burst. This is not necessary. Thing is, if the guy is for you then he is for you. If he isn’t for you then there’s nothing opening up can do about it. Developing feelings for someone is not a bad thing, but opening up is not necessary most of the times. You can only open up if the person asks you sincerely and explains properly what the reasons for asking are.

And you don’t want to go planting thoughts where nothing was, thereby growing pseudo affection.

Finally ladies, we don’t have to be all over the place for a guy because of our emotions because that guy may not be the right guy for us. Most of us have seen how guys ignore those girls that are all up in their faces and go for the ones that are quite minding their respective businesses and purposes. So please learn to control your emotions and don’t let your emotions control you.

Always remember your value and worth. You are worth far above rubies. And soon you would watch your own King that belongs to you come take you into his kingdom, at the right time, right season, and most importantly with the right motives.


Kindly contribute as a comment below.

Read answers to the previous questions here –>>; THE QUESTIONNAIRE

Nkechi Chiazor

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