The desire to get married, to be joined to another and loved romantically is one that is common to almost everyone. And it is such a beautiful desire. Like all other things that we desire to have, achieve, or attain, there is always a season of preparation. Singleness is a preparation phase before marriage.
However, while singleness is the waiting season for marriage, it is important to know that as a single, you are complete. You do not need marriage to complete you, as marriage was created for you and not you, for marriage. Contentment with being alone involves learning how to be fulfilled in your singleness.
While singleness is the waiting season for marriage, it is important to know that as a single, you are complete. Click To TweetAs a single person, you must find your personal identity and sense of wholeness within yourself and in relationship with God. A truly whole person is one who has, first, a healthy self-concept and a clear and solid faith in God. You must see relationship and marriage as an added blessing; and not what defines your life.
Living with this clear sense in mind, you will be able to enjoy your singleness while making the best of your single season in preparation for marriage. Singleness is a waiting season, and the wisest thing to do in any waiting season is to prepare for the next season.
Here are 4 things to do with your singleness:
1. Grow your roots
One of the greatest benefits of singleness, is the opportunity to give undivided attention to the pursuit of spiritual growth and a deep relationship with the Lord. Even Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 7 counsels singles to use this time of their life to pursue the Lord’s affairs and grow in undivided devotion to Him. You will not be single forever. There is no other season in life where it will just be you and the Lord. So, use this season wisely.
One of the greatest benefits of singleness, is the opportunity to give undivided attention to the pursuit of spiritual growth and a deep relationship with the Lord. Click To Tweet2. Build
Work to develop yourself as a single person. Learn to be like Adam; get completely lost in God. Totally consumed by God that He will have to interrupt you to bring another person into your life. Think of singleness as a blessing and a perfect opportunity for character development.
Work to develop yourself as a single person. Click To TweetSingleness is not something God gave us in one big lump and said, here swallow this! It’s a process, learning to be faithful, to be patient, to save your heart, and to wait on Him, one day, one year, one season at a time.
3. Service
Are you concerned about finding the “right” person? The best place to find a godly person is while serving the Lord. In God’s scheme of things, we generally find what we need and want when we are not actively looking for them but are more focused instead on serving the Lord and His Kingdom. When our eyes are steadfastly fixed on God, He brings everything else into our sphere like Matthew 6:33 connotes, prioritizing service.
Are you concerned about finding the “right” person? The best place to find a godly person is while serving the Lord. Click To Tweet4. Prepare
Be an asset. You should be preoccupied with preparing yourself for whomever God is preparing for you. Many people are so busy looking for the one God has prepared for them that they fail to prepare themselves for that person. Don’t make that mistake. Use this time of singleness to prepare yourself.
Many people are so busy looking for the one God has prepared for them that they fail to prepare themselves for that person. Click To TweetAlso, your future spouse needs prayers, so now is not the time to worry about what they will look like because we know that God’s plan is perfect and amazing in His time. So, as you prepare yourself physically, also prepare in the place of prayer.
Singleness is a time to entirely stay focused on Jesus Christ, pouring out your life for Him, as you equally love and serve everyone around you. Similarly, live fully and radiantly each and every day, ensuring to draw rich fulfillment and joy from a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Knowing fully well that God is as big as he says he is and he will not leave you high and dry in the area of romance. Be rest assured that you can never be disappointed when the author of romance holds the pen of your life. So why not determine to use your singleness, to faithfully write God a love song with your life.
Have any other thoughts about this? Please share in the comments section. You can also read “Single And Lonely? Here are things to do.”
Written by Iyadunni Dimka.
Great read; simple, but filled with practical wisdom.
This was very good! It was very wise, Godly counsel. I have a woman I have been crushing on for a long time. We actually talked a few weeks ago. She told me she didn’t feel the same way, at least right now. It was hard for me because it looked like we had been moving in the same direction for some time. I am a leader in a Christian Bible study and prayer group which she is a part of. I have done my best to be mature and Godly about how I have handled it. But admittedly, my thoughts consume me day in and day out. I have taken it to the Lord in prayer and I continue to do so. In my mind, we make the perfect couple. It’s hard because she is still a very good friend, very kind, and still is going to be a part of my circle. My hope of course is that she will someday change her mind, but I also know that this is not necessarily going to happen. That’s what I struggle with. I need to have clear thoughts in order to lead my groups and to minister the way God has called me to.
Thank you again for the article as it helps a lot. Please pray for me. It’s extremely rare that I find a girl I connect with this well. I don’t date much. It’s been 5 years since I found somebody that I feel this way about, and usually it doesn’t work out. But I hang on that verse that says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4). Thank you so much for your prayers.