Making new friends is in no way a small task for a lot of people, especially as an adult, tips to make new friends can feel like rocket science, from not knowing who to talk to, to what say, to not knowing how to say it.
Sharing the great times and the low times in life make living worth the effort. Friendships often make up the highs and lows of our lives, remember the last time you had a really good laugh, you probably did not crack the joke and laugh all by yourself.
Here are a few tips to make new friends as an adult.
1. Pursue Your Interests
One of the easiest tips to make new friends is to be in a place with people of similar interests. Think about it, you don’t have to stress over wondering if you have anything in common, you don’t have to stress if you will have something of similar interest to talk about. None of that, it’s like wanting to catch fish, and you being in a pond with lots of fishes.
Now is a good time to put that interest/skill to use, or rather, it is a good time to pursue those interests.
For example, you like to dance, sign up for a dance group, you like to take care of sick people join red cross, you love to exercise join an aerobic/yoga class, etc. Make sure that the club you sign up for is involved in an activity you are interested in.One of the easiest ways to make new friends is to be in a place with people of similar interests. Click To Tweet
2. Go out more
If you complain to me that you don’t have friends and you are having a problem making some, the very first question I’ll ask you is, ‘Do you go out often’, or ‘How often do you put yourself out there?’
You will not meet new people in your house, or by being/going to the exact same places every time. Go for functions, attend parties, hangout outdoors as much as possible. Step out of your comfort zone if you would like to meet new people.
I recently started telling my friends to tell me of events and seminars happening around them, or even if it’s just a casual hangout or leisure trips. I am actively putting myself in the position I am most likely going to meet new people.
And this point is important for people who tend to be more introverted like me. We will most likely not to go out on our own, we always need a push or strong reason to go out, so make one for yourself, or outrightly tell yourself to say yes to every offer to leave your usual space.You will not meet new people in your house, or by going to the exact same places every time. Click To Tweet
This is another way of putting yourself out there, and in a position to meet people with similar interest or passion. And one great thing about volunteering is that you meet people outside your usual sphere. You probably will find someone who shares the same passion with you.
Give your time and service to something you believe in, be it in your church or your community. You can never know who you will meet or what opportunities it will give you.Giving your time and service to something you believe in, be it in your church or your community will give you the opportunity to meet new people. Click To Tweet
4. Start a conversation
One of my few take away from the movie “The Sun Is Also A Star” for me is how starting a simple conversation with the intention of winning a friend can lead to a lifetime friendship, maybe even a relationship or marriage.
See if you need to make friends most of the time you have to be the one to take the first step, which oftentimes means being the first person to initiate a conversation. When you see someone you’ll like to talk to, step forward, smile and say ‘hello’ ask ‘how are you?’ and genuinely listen to people and speak to them about yourself.
I know there is a general snobbish nature among ladies in general towards men they do not know, but don’t let that put you off from making a move. What I will advice is, make yourself presentable, dress nice, be well groomed, smell nice and you will stand a better chance at having fewer turn downs.A simple conversation with the intention of winning a friend can lead to a lifetime friendship, maybe even a relationship or marriage. Click To Tweet
5. Allow yourself to be vulnerable
Yes, I get that many times allowing others see through you especially when you are just trying to know them, can be scary but you can only connect with people when they let you into their lives and you do the same. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, even when it is scary you can start with the small details.You can only connect with people when they let you into their lives and you do the same. Click To Tweet
6. Be kind
A man who has friends must himself be friendly – Pro 18:24.
Kindness enders you to people, it makes you more attractive. Think of that person that is always liberal with his snacks, offers to help more readily, just generally nice and kind, they are generally loved by many as compared to snobbish and insensitive ones.
Maybe you’ll win more friends with simple acts of kindness.You'll win more friends with simple acts of kindness. Click To Tweet
Making new friends can be uncomfortable and seem like a lot of work but one step at a time you will see the fruit of your labour, and that is new friends to walk life with.
It’s okay when we outgrow people or they outgrow us but being genuine and intentional with your relationships make them last longer. Also, remember that relationships demand a lot of forgiveness.
If you have more tips on how to make new friends please comment I would love to know.
I’ll recommend that you read
Re-Evaluating The Concept Of ‘a Friend’