I recently broke up with this wonderful guy, and I still miss him. Honestly, I won’t try to pretend like my heart is made of ice. We dated for over a year, and although we did have our issues here and there, we were in a really good place.
When we broke up, I was miserable. He even gave me the “..and I wanted to marry you” line. I was like, Ahhh!!!, what have I done?, but I kept my cool.
Once in a while (or even twice, or thrice), I find thoughts of my ex coming back into my head. Coupled with the fact that his house is a couple of streets away from where I work, things aren’t really funny.
You might be like, “C’mon, just call him and tell him what you feel, or, just walk to his house and say hi”, but, I would like to remind us that an ex is an ex for a reason.
It’s been almost two months now, and even though I still wonder how things could have been, I have been able to move from my previous state of misery to an even happier state, and I am here to share how I did that with you.
- Avoid rebound relationships: Please do not seek to end the pain you feel by getting into another relationship. You will end up hurting the other person’s feelings. Ultimately, that person becomes your rebound guy/girl. I failed to realize this, and I got into one. well, the relationship ended, and now we barely even talk. Ideally, this should be the time when all the things that caused issues in your relationship should be addressed. Talk to your friends or parents, and find ways to resolve these issues.
- Read books: I love books anyways, so I just used this time to dive deeper into my books. I read my bible, books off the internet, hardcover books, books, books, and more books. They helped take my mind off my recently changed relationship status.
- Get closer to God: When I ended my relationship, I realized that Jesus is the best boyfriend to have. I consciously began to make efforts to get as close to him as possible. I would wake up early to talk with him, write letters to him, and ask for his opinion on what I would wear out on a particular day. The best part is that he will always be willing to listen to you, and won’t give you “..and I wanted to marry you” threats.
- Journal: Here I go again with writing things down on paper. Journaling is an amazing thing to do. If you find it difficult to express the pain you feel to others, write it down in your journal. Since no one is going to read your journal, feel very free to pour your raw feelings out into those pages. You will feel a whole lot better after doing this. I know I did.
- Talk to friends: I really find it difficult to speak with others about how I feel. This is because most times it ends with me crying, and I hate people seeing me cry. Well, I spoke to a really, really good friend of mine, and I felt much better after we spoke. Please if you do chose to talk to someone about how you feel, make sure it is someone whom you can trust not to go around spreading your gist.
- Listen to music: During one of times when my ex and I had issues, one mistake I made was to listen to slow, heartbreaking songs that made me cry even harder. Please refrain from doing that!!. Instead, listen to lively, upbeat, uplifting songs that will improve your mood. Music always has a way of making us feel better.
- Give it time: As difficult as it might seem, time actually does heal all wounds. Emotional, physical, whatever kind of wound. Just let time do its work. Eventually memories will fade, fires will go dim, hearts will mend, and you’ll feel better.
I must confess here that I am not at that point when I can say I am completely over my ex, but I am in a much happier place than I was two months ago.
I hope these points above can help someone who might be hurting feel better, and come to the realization that a failed relationship is not the end of the world.
If you do have anything to add that could be of help to anyone else, please do drop them in the comment box below. Also, don’t forget to share this post, as it could be of immense help to someone out there.
God bless you. Kindly leave a comment below ?
And Read also;
HOW TO HANDLE A HEARTBREAK AND/OR BREAKUP
DO YOU THINK TAKING A BREAK WILL FIX YOUR AILING RELATIONSHIP
I am in this exact space! Will you get back with him if you had a chance?
I miss him so much, like you I got into a relationship after I broke up with him, still in the relationship. Yet…
I need help! I’m doing a fasting/prayer session for God’s clarity, but I literally need to stop myself from acting on impulse. Do you have an email address I can reach you on? I’m happy that I can relate to/with you. Like our stories are too similar.
Hey Ada,
To answer your question, I will NOT get back with him if I had the chance.
Although I still miss him, I understand now that not everyone who exits your life should be let back in.
You can send me an email at okparaqueen@gmail.com.
well done sis. Even when you break up and enter another relationship after you feel better,there is still every tendency you will think about him.which is normal.i mean, that is what i call memories.it doesn’t mean you dont love ur current bf.it just means that you shouldn’t continually dwell in the past memories.
thanks.
well said!