How to Deal With What You Cannot Change

 a llittle girl Ilha de Mozambique

I entered the room fully lit by a few minutes past 2 am Peter like the other boys in the room were fast asleep but I notice the piece of clothing over Peter’s face. I didn’t have to think too much; he doesn’t like sleeping with the light on, but in this hostel setting where it is nobody’s room, Peter has no other choice but to make the best of the not so fair or pleasant experience, and from his look, he is enjoying his sleep.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference. _ Reinhold Niebuhr

Those words may seem as lack of faith, but they are true. I have seen them be the real secret of a life of happiness. Do you know how many people are living today, throwing their whole life away, joy and peace just in pursuit of what they cannot have or change? Can you sincerely smile when the words DENIED boldly displayed before you, even when it is your right? How do you deal with what you cannot change?
The serenity; peace of mind, to accept the things you cannot change, the things that you just have to manage or live with or live without. This not an excuse not to push or aim, not a reason to settle for the statuesque
In the original version of Niebuhr’s serenity prayer, he added;

Living one day at a time,

Enjoying one moment at a time,

Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace…

Not all things are meant to be changed, the inconvenient, the bad and the ugly. Some are just school teachers, they are gone once the subject is mastered. Hear how James puts it “for when the way is rough, your patience has a chance to grow. “So let it grow, and don’t try to squirm out of your problems (So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely). For when your patience is finally in full bloom, then you will be ready for anything, strong in character, full and complete” James 1:2-3.
At the same time, you are not always supposed to live with the inconvenience, the bad and the ugly. Some are meant to be changed. We have people that are satisfied with all their life’s experiences why some others are dissatisfied with everything. Neither of these two is the best, but those that have the wisdom to know the difference between the two live life shoulder high, face lit all the time. Without the wisdom, you will be entangled in an endless battle. Trying to change what can never change causing a life of frustration. And when you live with what is meant to be changed you short-change yourself.
So join Reinhold Niebuhr in saying the serenity prayer, embrace life in its wholeness. Before you pray for a thorn in the flesh to leave, ask if it was meant to be changed at all.
I really hope this article communicates what it’s meant to, embracing life even when you have to live with somethings and not faithlessness and complacency.
Thank you for reading. I’m really looking forward to seeing your view on this issue as a comment. Do remember to follow by your email so as to get every post directly in your email box.

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About author


Tolulope Oludapo is a young Christian who lends his voice through the media by sharing practical wisdom for everyday living in the most experiential and simplified fashion. This has fetched him the direct followership of over 30,000 users on his blog, A blog he founded. He loves to write on varying subjects that affect life, faith, relationship...everyday living.
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