Faith

How to Judge Good from Bad Desires

Desires are an integral part of our lives as humans. The moment we stop desiring things, we seize to be humans. Every day for us brings in its wake fresh desires- a desire to love and be loved, a desire to eat, a desire to work e.t.c. But as indispensable as desires are, we know not every desire is healthy for us, not everything we desire should be pursued, thus the need to constantly bring every desire under scrutiny, to make sure they align with God’s desires.

As believers, our lives no longer count as ours, but we live to serve much higher interests, those of our heavenly Father. How then do we judge good and healthy desires from unhealthy and unrighteous ones, especially for things not expressly stated in the bible as wrong? I would give us a few points in form of questions you should ask yourself about the things you desire and try to give some biblical references.

The following should help you determine whether your desires are coming from the right place:

 – Do you desire a thing just to show off or Oppress others?

This is a good way to judge your desires. Ask yourself why you want a thing so badly. I know this year everyone wants to own a Benz. But why though? Do you just want it because you feel people would become subservient to you?

This is a good way to judge your desires. Ask yourself why you want a thing so badly. Click To Tweet

Many people desire things so that their enemies can feel intimidated and sadly this type of thought process has slipped into the prayers of many believers. You hear prayers like ‘bless me so that I can embarrass my enemies’. But the apostle James has something to say about such motives.

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.James 4:1-3

Many people desire things so that their enemies can feel intimidated and sadly this type of thought process has slipped into the prayers of many believers. You hear prayers like ‘bless me so that I can embarrass my enemies’ Click To Tweet

So, check your motives. Be sure you don’t desire things so that you can show off, intimidate people or prove a point.

– Are your desires born out of Greed or Covetousness?

This is a very tricky one because no one ever sees it coming. But it takes a high level of introspectiveness to catch yourself when you are slipping into greed and covetousness or when you begin to desire things inspired by greed. This is a question of limits. How far is too far? Since only you as an individual can give a good answer to this, all I can say is that you constantly check your desires and motives to be sure you are not accumulating things for the wrong reasons. A biblical example to ponder upon, is the man who till today is still referred to as the rich fool.

Then he said to them, Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.” And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’ “Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’ “But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’ “This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God.”

Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. – Luke 12:15-22

Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own. Click To Tweet

Looking at the scriptures above, it might be quite difficult for many believers today to see what the man did wrong, because that is how many have been taught to view Christianity. So there is always more, there is always a place called ’it’ you aspire to make it to, where you are is never enough, God always has something bigger for you….. Contentment is fast becoming a foreign topic today, which is a sharp contrast from its biblical emphasis. So please, take off the religious cloak you have placed over your discernment and check yourself to see that you have not started to desire things from a place of greed and covetousness.

But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. – 1 Tim 6:6-9

 – Do you Desire things that would hurt Others?

Many people desire things that they know if attained would hurt or probably kill people, but still they keep on fanning the flames of their sordid desires. Never become so desperate that you don’t count the lives of others as a high price to pay for your desires, especially when death can be totally avoided.

Never become so desperate that you don’t count the lives/peace/comfort of others as a high price to pay for your desires. Click To Tweet

A Christian is someone who trains himself to as much as possible consider the impact of his/her decisions on others before making them. We see people put the lives of others at risk for political desires and ambitions. This should not be the statement of a believer’s life. At this point, I would love to give a biblical reference of someone so caught up in his desires, that he didn’t mind hurting his step sister.

In the story, we see Amnon obsessed with his sister Tamar to the point he raped her. Absolom, Tamar’s brother plot to take Ammnon’s life and he succeeds. Unchecked desires most times might cost you your life, so it is very important that they are scrutinized.

A Christian is someone who trains himself to as much as possible consider the impact of his/her decisions on others before making them. Click To Tweet

In conclusion, our desires must come from our understanding of our current place and status. We are now seated with Christ in heavenly places, so we must allow our motives and desires to be viewed from those lenses.

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Colossians 3:1-4

Thank you for reading, I would like to know your thoughts in the comments section.

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A man helped by God, who tells evocative stories.
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