How To Survive With Your Stepmother

I love my stepmom!


That may not mean much to you if you don’t understand what stepmoms represent, especially in Africa, Nigeria specifically.

Stepmoms are as bad as the Cinderella’s evil stepmom, and at times they are like the witches with black teeth dancing around a banana tree in a typical Nollywood movie, at least that is what we are made to believe. I definitely do not want to live a polygamous life for any reason, and I would not want to just praise polygamy and having stepmoms as a walk in the park, but if you have found yourself in this situation, like I did, then you have to find a way to not just survive but indeed live enjoyably.

I grew up with my stepmom and I decided early to take some steps which I want to share with you. Ready?

  1. Throw away stereotypes: I need you to throw away all you have heard about step mothers eating their stepdaughters or offering their step sons for sacrifice. Maybe this is true, but it can’t be for you since you are God’s child and He is always watching out for your good (You are right?)

Studying God’s word helps you renew your mind and throw away these stereotypes. Scripture spells in out by saying “For our weapon of warfare are not carnal, but mighty…….to the PULLING DOWN OF STRONGHOLDS…” This witch-step-mom syndrome is a stronghold that needs to be pulled down with God’s word.

  1. Honour Her: “Honour your father and mother…” Ephesians 6 states this clearly and I believe that your stepmom qualifies for the position of ‘mother’. How do you honour your stepmom?
  2. Go out of your way to help her.
  3. Buy her things.
  4. Respond to her request and errands pleasantly.
  5. Pray and be patient. There will be times when you try to be at your best but it will be thrown back in your face. Don’t worry too much, Pray for her, remember she is human with all the associated frailties. Allow patience have its full course in you.
  6. Love Her: Put 1Corinthians 13 to work in your relationship with her and let’s see how that works out.
  7. Speak well to and of her: Don’t bad mouth her for any reason. Treat her like you would your mum.

I trust these eight (8) tough, yet simple ways will help transform your relationship with your step-mom. It may be an instant change and it may be a process but be sure that it will work. I look forward to hearing from you!


PS: how about you buy her a gift today and see how she reacts to it? 

Kindly share some wisdom that might help other readers as a comment as a comment below.

About author


Tolulope Oludapo is a young Christian who lends his voice through the media by sharing practical wisdom for everyday living in the most experiential and simplified fashion. This has fetched him the direct followership of over 30,000 users on his blog, A blog he founded. He loves to write on varying subjects that affect life, faith, relationship...everyday living.
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