LADIES: How Do You Tell a Guy You Don’t Like Him, GUYS: How Should a Lady Tell You She Doesn’t Like You?


“Aww…I didn’t know you saw me that way, but “I love you as a friend””, was the text written on a friend’s BBM Display Picture, after laughing for a while I asked her about it and she expressed how she hates that phrase, but knowing fully well that it’s a language spoken more often by them, I asked her what she tells the guys that like her and ask her out, but who she doesn’t like or doesn’t wanna date. And here is her own turn-down phrase; “I’m not ready for a relationship”.

I’ll be posting an article I have titled “A better alternative to “I love you as a friend” soon, but I really want your answer to the question below.

Ladies; What do you tell guys that you don’t like and you are certain that you don’t want to date when they make love advances towards you?

Guys; since we do the chasing most of the times and not everyone you like will like or agree to date us. How will you like the lady to tell you that she doesn’t love you or doesn’t wanna date you?

Kindly post as a comment.

So as not to be biased, I know girls make advances to guys also; Is it a right thing? How should the guy nicely let her know he isn’t interested (If he isn’t interested), All of that in another post(s).

I’m eager to read your comment. To post a comment, just TYPE IN YOUR COMMENT and hit POST COMMENT, and voila.

Read also;


“The Friend-Zone”, Blessing in disguise


Sunday Gist 23rd August

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1 Comment

  1. For me, it’s usually kinda tough to just be blunt about it, especially if the guy has become a close friend with whom we share a lot in common. But, however, for someone I am just beginning to get acquainted with, who is already “chasing”, I would be very blunt with the person.
    Like for instance, to the close friend, my reply would be “I really cherish and respect the fact that you feel this way towards me. But because I value this friendship over a weird relationship, I will be very honest with you and not lead you on. The feeling ain’t mutual. I am really sorry.”
    To the acquainted dude, my reply would be “I really appreciate you coming upfront letting me into how you feel about me. But, I am really sorry I can’t date you.”

  2. I would like a girl to let me down by telling me she is not ready now for a relationship but she has to sincerely tell me how great I am.

    1. Hahahaha…nice one, I feel your style 😀

  3. Jane Okpala “As for me…. I show the signs of not being interested and I will like the guys to acknowledge that.. Hope this infor is of gr8 help”

  4. I usually just say, “wow. I’m flattered, but I don’t feel the same way about you. Besides, you only feel this way cos you haven’t dated me. I’m sure there’s someone waaaaay better for you.” I dunno mehn. I try to show the guy reasons why we wouldn’t work. And that’s if I care. If i don’t I’d just tell u point blank, i dont like u that way and we wouldn’t work. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Well, now I realize u could meet anyone anywhere later in life so I try my best to be as nice as possible. Lol.

    1. …Besides, you only feel this way cos you haven’t dated me. I’m sure there’s someone waaaaay better for you… That’s some deep stuffs there. Funny but wise contribution. Thanks for leaving a comment 😀

      1. But is telling him “there is someone way better than me for you” not self degrading and also doesn’t it send a wrong message about your worth to him. Just saying!

  5. How would I like a girl to say, ‘No’? Hmm..Girls can be funny.. They can chop your money when they fully know they ain’t down for you… So, how should a girl turn down my advances? First, reject whatever I get you.. and make your answer plain from day 1…Don’t tell me ‘maybe not now, maybe later’ while you have your eyes on another guy… Don’t hug me giving me false hope…. You can guess I had an experience.. I guess my emotions overrided the voice of the Spirit.. dazzal ?

  6. 1st of all, when am in a relationship and I meet a guy who seems to want something other than been friends I tell him am in a relationship and am happy in it, if am outta a relationship and want to still have you as my friend, I will tell you, am not ready to see anyone for now(that’s d strategy).a wise guy should know I don’t see him d@ way, that’s the reason for such response.

  7. Hmmm..I will tell him I like him just as a friend…if he keeps pestering me for a relationship I will tell him am not convinced about having a relationship with him..shikena

  8. Hmmm. How would I like to be rejected?
    1. In plain language.
    Don’t say ‘not now’ when you mean ‘never’.
    2. Early.
    Seriously, do you need 6 months to know you don’t want to date a guy?
    3. Respectfully.
    In a way that the friendship can continue thereafter.
    Now that I’ve answered your question Tee, lemie ask mine.
    Why & How would a guy let this happen to him?
    If she likes you ‘like that’ and your eyes are open ( not blinded by ‘love’ and reading romance into a simple hug), I believe a guy CAN tell her response before he asks.
    The end of my epistle.

  9. For me if the guy is my friend I turn it into a joke at that point, i’d whine him until he gives up dat day (meanwhile my heart is beating lyk crazy and praying to God that He rescues me from that moment).. it gives me time to sum up courage to tell him no ( i hate dishing out rejection it makes me feel guilty) when next it pops up, my answer will be that he is my friend and I wouldn’t like to spoil what we have and that I make a better friend than girlfriend because emotions tend to complicate things so we should jst carry on as frnds. I knw it’s a long epistle buh they always listen?… But if I don’t know you, we just met and you think it is wise to ask a stranger out, as politely as I can be I say I can’t go out with you, no guilt there.

    1. hahahaha “they always listen”

  10. […] LADIES: How Do You Tell A Guy You Don’t Like Him, GUYS: How Will You Like Like Her To Tell You… […]

  11. Well…whether he is my close friend or I just met him, I have learned to respect every guy whether or not I believe he is qualified for me.
    So….I simply tell him(early enough…) that I don’t see us progressing into such!… As I have someone else in mind(if I really do)..
    If I don’t, I would still tell him the same as above except the fact that I have someone else in mind.
    There’s no need playing on people’s intelligence and lying! All in the name of not wanting them to feel bad!! Its even more painful..Emotions are deep!
    After telling him either of the above, I give him time to heal(if we r close friends) being extra sensitive about his reactions….and when I believe he is okay, we continue our platonic friendship.
    Thanks Tee Abraham…for such lovely writeups

  12. I also support Ikhide! Guys should be extra sensitive in observing prospective platforms for relationships to avoid heartbreak!!!
    Girls too…and girls…why chase a man ooooo?

  13. I just say”thanks,but I am not interested” I don’t refer to it again and I hope he doesn’t. Don’t ask me why because I would say “NO REASON” we are both adults and know what we want.

  14. hmmm…
    I think it’s because I have a problem, but the truth sha from me oh.
    I think the girl should just say it anyhow (as she’s led to say it…lol), because it just boils down to one thing: We sha will not date.
    No matter how the english is decorated, it passes only one message: We sha will not date.
    If she decides to be insultive about it, or mock me, it’s okay sha. She’s human, and she has her problems and weaknesses too, so what I do is keep her weaknesses before my eyes, and yet choose to see her as someone who needs someone that cares (I donno about you oh, but this makes me feel stronger emotionally – that I could be turned down and still love). Actually it makes me feel like God…lol.
    It’s okay to love to the full, and be turned down by the one you love. It just means that you can care for someone else much more than the person can care for you.
    That’s my opinion sha oh…

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