If you’re new to the term: Missionary Dating, let me enlighten you. Missionary dating is basically dating an unbeliever with the hope that he or she would believe the gospel and gbam! you’d be able to marry them. So basically you are dating as a missionary… you get it?
A lot of single believers, male and female alike get trapped in relationships with unbelievers and get emotionally entangled. Some are unable to recover from it and they land in marriage (from frying pan to fire type of situation) While others do get out but they get out having wasted time, emotions and with lots of emotional baggage. This is one way the enemy tries to steal away young believers’ time and peace and we ought not to be ignorant of his devices.Missionary Dating is a trap. Avoid it! Click To Tweet
- Firstly, the Bible says not to team up with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14).
This doesn’t say to avoid unbelievers because that would mean you exiting this world, but for things such as a dating relationship (which is supposed to be aimed towards marriage), pairing with an unbeliever is totally out of the will of God, there is no need to rationalize the matter.
Really, think about it, what has light got to do with darkness? It really just doesn’t work. It’s just like you trying to get better in your walk with God and partnering with someone who isn’t as interested – growth in such an environment is very difficult and near impossible (1 Corinthians 15:33)
- Also, nobody has the power to change anyone or convict a man save the Holy Spirit.
Sister, there is no point trying to be assistant Holy Spirit. Brother, it is not in your power. The instruction is to preach the gospel to all men and that we do with all our hearts but everyone stands responsible for their walk with God. You can’t change a man or make him/her accept Jesus. By all means, reach out to unbelievers but don’t start dating them while at it hoping they’d change.
- A lot can go wrong with missionary dating.
For instance, the person can try to get it right with the Lord because of you and not because they really are convicted. Remember, a house founded on a faulty foundation cannot stand. There is nothing good that starts out from deceit, dishonesty.
- Another thing that can go wrong is you start to grow cold towards the things of God.
There is the probability that once emotions get in the way, your love for the fellow would start to replace your love for the things of God. You’d start to spend more and more time with him/her and because the person isn’t inclined towards the things of God, you too begin to grow cold.
Again, try to imagine a future with this yet-to-believe-in-God person, the confusion the children in the home would grow up in, the disunity in the house, it really isn’t what you’d like to have.
So why not stick to God’s way of doing things? It’s really the better way of doing things. I know you may be desperate and tired of waiting but when it comes to marriage, its better no one than the wrong one. Marriage isn’t a child’s play, it is a serious matter and shouldn’t be treated with levity.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you can’t have unbelievers around you or you run away from them but entering into a dating relationship with them is totally out of the will of God.
God does use instructions and commands to protect and safeguard us. It is very important to set boundaries just as God has in His word. If you don’t set standards and boundaries, when the situations present themselves, the confusion would be real.
Trust God’s timing for your life and understand that God’s plans (including as concerning your marital life) for you are for good and not for evil. Just rest in that fact.