When is the best time to introduce bae (as your bae, not just a friend) to your parents?

We asked this question on our Instagram page here We gave 3 options

a. When you start dating.
b. When you are ready to marry.
c. After you/he proposes.

And we asked people to include theirs.

Read below a few of the responses we got.

 

 

 

From all the responses, we can all agree that the right or the perfect time to introduce the person you are dating and intending to get married to your parents differ from person to person, and the kind of parents you have or culture also has a huge influence on the timing. But we can all agree on a couple of things.

1. Your relationship shouldn’t be kept a secret from our parents.

@thealphadawn gave a reply we can all relate to. Oftentimes, your mother may know your relationship status or the person asking you out, when you’re close to saying ‘Yes’ to a proposal into a relationship, or when the relationship gets serious. It is also the same for some others whose dads are pretty open, free and friendly.

There is wisdom in not leaving your parents in total darkness about your love life. Their involvement in your relationship(s) has the potential of saving you from headache.  Parents have a great amount of wisdom we cannot deny or ignore, therefore we are able to get wise counsel early enough.

There is wisdom in not leaving your parents in total darkness about your love life. Their involvement in your relationship(s) has the potential of saving you from headache. Click To Tweet

Yes, a lot of those are biased or experiential which might not hold on all grounds, but they still know something you’ll need to make the best decision.

Plus when you introduce your partner to your parents you can assess what/how they feel about the person when you know it’s easy to know what battle you need to fight and actually start fighting it early.

In the situation where your parents don’t agree with your choice for whatever reason, it is wiser to know at the early stage of your relationship not after you’ve been dating for three years and he has proposed.

Parents have a great amount of wisdom we cannot deny or ignore, therefore we are able to get wise counsel early enough. Click To Tweet

2. You don’t want to introduce too many people to your parent(s)

Introducing someone to your parents as the ‘Love Of Your Life’ when the relationship isn’t serious yet, or when you aren’t sure and certain this is heading towards a marriage oftentimes puts you at the risk of introducing too many people to your parents.

In some cases, you stay in the wrong relationship simply because you have told your parents this is the person you are getting married to.

Don't stay in the wrong relationship just because you already introduced him/her to your parents. Click To Tweet

There is the wisdom in telling your parents when you start liking someone, or when a guy is just hanging around your space giving all the green lights.

Just as stated by @iam_bethel – Before we start dating, when I start seeing hints my mum will know 😂😂so she can join me in prayers. The prayer support, the counsel…

But I believe this thought will also help you be intentional about your relationship choices, you ask yourself, “Is this the kinda person I want to introduce to my parents? If ‘No’, then what are we doing together?.

Be intentional about your relationship choices Click To Tweet Introducing someone to your parents as your partner when the relationship isn't serious oftentimes puts you at the risk of introducing too many people to your parents. Click To Tweet

In summary;

I believe that we can carry our parents along in the entire phase of our love life. It might be to just let them know what your relationship status is, you might not need to bring him home to meet your dad till you are staring marriage in the face.

But you should let them know you are dating someone and let them know who the person is (name, pictures…) when the relationship become serious.

I think most importantly, be open and cordial with your parents on this matter as early as possible. Know their thought on an inter-tribal relationship, about different denominations, about personality traits and character, about the age difference, all things relationship and marriage related, it will save you a whole lot, or should I say, it will have you better prepared.

Be open and cordial with your parents about your relationship(s) as early as possible. Know their thoughts and preferences concerning marriage, it will make you better prepared. Click To Tweet

I hope we have all answered the question pretty well for you.

Please feel free to leave a comment, or a question, or fire us an email at hello@lifegiva.com.

I’ll recommend that you also read; Living With Parents – Dealing with Rebellion

And #PSSeries: Inter-tribal Dating/Marriage

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