As I walked down the hill,
shame,
sin,
guilt,
suffering followed me side by side.
There was obviously nothing wrong
for they have walked with me all my life.
It has become a norm to me.
We gisted and talked broadly but something was wrong,
something was missing.
The talks were immoralities,
the gists were deaths and they all laughed but it wasn’t genuine.
It was just the surface.
How do I pull out of this,
they are the only people I have known all my life.
They are what I call “friends”.
They are my definition of been cool
But then we approached something.
It looked different.
I have never seen this before.
It looked old, crooked, archaic and even rugged but it wasn’t just all.
I could feel it drawing me
“Let’s go, we can’t go there, its not where we are going to”.
Sin lamented.
“This thing is too old, we can’t stay near it , we can’t ant be seen near it”.
Shame cried
They pulled me back.
But No, there was more.
It was Him in another form.
It was Him I have heard of.
This is different.
I felt comfortable with Him
I know I needed Him
I could feel comfort there even when there was no one physically
I could talk deeply
I could open up to Him
“You cant be here”
Guilt shouted
I opened my mouth to speak but it came out as a shout
“leave me alone ,You are not of me”
I laid there with Him
Oh, what comfort there is
I could do anything without the fear of discrimination.
I could do anything without shame or guilt.
I could pour out my heart
This is real comfort
THIS IS THE CROSS.
THIS IS SACRIFICE.
THIS IS TRUE LOVE.
—
Ijeoma Amagwula
Ijeoma Amagwula by name. Photographer and writer.
Currently a student of Unilag. Love to write about personal
experiences.
Connect with Ijeoma
Instagram: @ije__
Facebook: ijeoma Amagwula
Snapchat: jenniphar
Instagram: @ije__
Facebook: ijeoma Amagwula
Snapchat: jenniphar
