Love

Should You Date Based on Class; What A Man Can Buy You?

Lanre Olusola, popularly known as “The Catalyst”, recently posted a trending video made by one @princess_uzooma. In it, the lady advised men to go for women in their level. If not, there will be problems. 

According to her, “women are trying to solve a problem. And there’s no way they will be happy in the relationship if the problem is not solved.” She buttressed her point by adding that a lot of men don’t want to date their level. That they would rather go after women they cannot maintain, which becomes a problem for them. 

In explaining “their level”, she gave an example of how she wants to drive a G-gad and if a man buys her one, it will make her “come” and excited. For other women, it could be a cone of ice cream, a bottle of Fanta, a Toyota Corolla, or a helicopter, that would excite them. 

She said other guys who are aware of her point will rather date down, that is, go after a low maintenance woman. She rounded off by saying that men should date according to “their pockets”. That if they date above their level, their woman will remain ungrateful to them. 

Based on the foregoing, the question then is, “Do women measure their relationship “levels” based on materialistic desires?  Should You Date Based on Class; What A Man Can Buy You?

Lifegiva asked a few women to react to @princess_uzooma line of reasoning and they sure have something to say about it. 

Although their responses were edited for grammatical and syntax purposes, nothing was done to alter their exact opinions. They also chose to remain anonymous. 

Here goes: 

Miss J: Lol it’s nonsense. I thought she was going to say something smart but apparently not. A guy with a 100k salary can date a woman that is high maintenance as far as money is not a prerequisite for their love. These things aren’t cast on stone.

Miss S: Hmn. I think the important thing is contentment. Cause you’ll always find a man who is doing better than your man financially. Does it mean that every time your taste “levels up” you go and meet another person? 

I believe that one of the things that women want in a relationship is security, including financial security. And the ability to earn is definitely something to consider when you go into a relationship with someone. Especially if it’s a serious relationship. I don’t know what she means by saying that a lot of women in relationships want to solve a problem.

I believe that one of the things that women want in a relationship is security, including financial security. And the ability to earn is definitely something to consider when you go into a relationship with someone. Click To Tweet

Miss F: First of all, it really is not about material things to be honest. If someone likes you they like you. Tbh, everyone is materialistic but some just more than others. And it honestly depends on the kind of person you’re with. 

I always say that if you need money to impress the person you’re dating then you probably shouldn’t be in that relationship, not everything is about money. BUT, people like nice things to be done for them. 

I always say that if you need money to impress the person you’re dating then you probably shouldn’t be in that relationship, not everything is about money. Click To Tweet

At the end of the day the helicopter and Fanta comparison is a lie. The thing is some people are grateful with even the little they’re given. And they’re some others that even with a helicopter, they’re still going to complain. Find your person and stick to them.

I know up until this point it seems like I disagree with her. The reason I washed my hands off under 26 men is because of what she’s saying but not even about the money.

Miss O: From all I heard, she’s speaking from a materialistic point of view.  There’s more to a relationship than what both parties can offer each other material/financial wise.  

There’s character, charisma, intelligence, etc.  If you’re with someone that can’t afford what you can afford to buy for yourself, that’s fine.  What values are they adding to your life? There are more important factors to consider than whether a person can satisfy your material needs. Why is she measuring a woman’s worth by material things? 

There are more important factors to consider than whether a person can satisfy your material needs. Why is she measuring a woman’s worth by material things?  Click To Tweet

Yes, having someone get you these nice things are sweet but what else can they offer. I believe there’s just more to life and relationships than material things. Cause what happens when a man that can afford to buy you a G-gad can’t do it in a year’s time cause his business failed? Levels have to be measured by more intrinsic values than materialism. Hope I hit the nail on the head?

Miss D: This is RUBBISH! And some people will say, “I don’t want to settle blah blah blah”. It’s not about settling for a certain kind of person but about having a toxic, materialistic, purposeless life and mindset. Because if this is your mindset about going into a relationship or marriage with someone, then that means that while you were dating, if the person could give you a car, when you get married, for instance, and he cannot afford to give you a car, and you have to sell the car, what then will happen to the relationship and the marriage? That’s the first thing. 

Remember the story jbums shared about that time of her marriage? If she did not understand or carry the right kind of mindset into her marriage, the marriage would have ended a long time ago. She would have said, “Ah, this guy cannot come through and he’s still telling me to sell my car. And I’m the one doing everything at home.”

So yeah, princess_uzooma opinion is very and a stupid mindset to have. And I was even wondering what the woman was talking about because she was saying nonsense with so much boldness. 

The last is, some women actually feel this way. I have heard certain women say that they can’t date certain kinds of men and it’s not about these men’s character or what they have to offer in terms of purpose and all of that. It’s about money and material things. They can’t date a man who isn’t earning six figures and all of that.

They feel that if a man meets a woman with certain tastes, he should be ready to match up with that. And to be honest, it’s just nonsense because it reduces the purpose of marriage to material things. It reduces the purpose of oneness to material things and that’s not God’s purpose or plan for marriage. It’s not. 

As much as the husband is supposed to be a priest, provider and a protector over his household, it is not to the end that he’s “killed” for not giving you G-Gad. A responsible man is not someone that gives you everything you want but everything you need e.g a roof over your head, a car and other necessary things. If he’s able to provide certain things you want, all well and good. But it is not to the end that you need him for the things he can give.

This even translates to our relationship with God. Marriage is not a transactional relationship. It is a partnership. Our relationship with God is not supposed to be a transactional relationship. It’s a partnership with him to ensure and enforce his purpose here on earth. So people who view marriage or relationship like this person have a major problem in their relationship with God. That means they see God as what he’s able to give to them, not as who He is. I know I’m taking it far but… I have a lot of thoughts about this but I’m going to stop here. 

My Summary: 

It’s not about the money/material. A materialistic person can never be satisfied, they will always want to level up, someone will always have more or offer more. 

A materialistic person can never be satisfied, they will always want to level up, someone will always have more or offer more. Click To Tweet

It’s seeing value and not liquid resources. It’s seeing someone beyond just what they can do for you but what your partnership can achieve. I don’t want a woman just cos she’s on a level I can maintain, I want someone who challenges me to be better and do better and who our union empowers us to be better and do better.

It’s still knowing what is important to you. Some women don’t want a provider, they need someone who will be present and honest. Value comes in different ways. It’s not just material. Immaterial things sometimes are more valuable than money; peace of mind, honesty, and partnership. What is important to you?

Value comes in different ways. It's not just material. Immaterial things sometimes are more valuable than money; peace of mind, honesty, and partnership. What is important to you? Click To Tweet

From the foregoing, what’s more important to you in a relationship? Do let us know in the comments section below. 

You can also read: No Marriage is Exempt from Tests and Trials, says Mrs Black

About author

Articles

Tolulope Oludapo is a young Christian who lends his voice through the media by sharing practical wisdom for everyday living in the most experiential and simplified fashion. This has fetched him the direct followership of over 30,000 users on his blog, lifegiva.com. A blog he founded. He loves to write on varying subjects that affect life, faith, relationship...everyday living.
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